Paper Dolls

by Ribbon Road

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1.
Paper Dolls 04:09
PAPER DOLLS Beaten by the world, shattered in the wind Just like a wounded bird with broken paper wings And though she cries alone with no-one there to see There are many like her, just like you and me Chorus Paper dolls, holding hands Hang together, try to stand Paper dolls do not cry Hang together, stay alive Crushed in smothered dreams, pushed beyond believing Smashed to smithereens, someone always leaving Always to be trusted, always to be kind She never was forgiven, never was so blind Chorus Paper dolls, holding hands Hang together, try to stand Paper dolls do not cry Hang together, stay alive Blown away on beaches, stretched within her mind Pulled by pretty speeches till the next time Hiding in the bruises that never leave a mark Wishing she could lose it and stay there in the dark Bitten by the words, ruined by the meaning Every time it hurts, with every ruined feeling And though she cries alone with no-one there to see There are many like her, just like you and me Chorus Paper dolls, holding hands Hang together, try to stand Paper dolls do not cry Hang together, stay alive Copyright: Words and Music – Brenda Heslop (2009 Ribbon Road Music)
2.
ROUND AND ROUND I take back my heart I take back my life You tore it all up You broke me in pieces So I’ll take my leave Now I don’t believe Your punishment lies And you proved deceitful I loved you then You told me it would be better When I asked when You only gave me this broken old record Going round and round and round and round again I’ll take back my arms My body and soul I carry the scars Where I learned you hate me And I’ll leave the keys You wouldn’t let me So I’m running away ‘Cos you won’t believe me I loved you then You told me it would be better When I asked when You only gave me this broken old record Going round and round and round and round again I’ll take back myself Whoever she is Somebody will know And you won’t be part of it Won’t be too soon If I never see you Just leave me alone The end of my world is I loved you then You told me it would be better When I asked when You only gave me this broken old record Going round and round and round and round again I loved you then You told me it would be better When I asked when You only gave me this broken old record Going round and round and round and round round and round and round and round round and round and round This is the end
3.
IT COMES VISITING It comes visiting It comes visiting And it tears through your mind like a storm And it’s critical Yes, it’s critical That you’re rescued and taken from harm But the blame is there And your name is there And the boxes are ticking against you It comes visiting It comes visiting And there’s nothing to do or to say It comes calling It comes calling And it sneaks up and hits from behind And you’re falling You’re just falling And the stairs are too heavy to climb And you dare not move ‘Cos it can’t be proved And it happened a long time ago It comes calling It comes calling I don’t tell ‘cos I already know It comes back to me It comes back to me Like a penny that’s bad and not worth it And it laughs at me How it laughs at me Still blocking the way and I curse it Try to get away Break the chains today Just a step away I could be different It comes back to me It comes back to me And I live in the ruins alone It comes under me It comes under me Like an earthquake is shaking me bones And I’m wondering I’m left wondering Is there anywhere I could call home When the fear is walls And you lose it all And because you’re a woman they use it It comes under me It comes under me Like a wave washing my legs away It comes over me It comes over me Like a cloud shadows over the land it’s all over me it’s all over me and I’m running as fast as I can but it calls me back calls the kettle black and I’m empty and dead in the water it comes over me, it’s all over me it comes over me, it’s all over me and a shadow rests over my heart Words and Music - Brenda Heslop 2018 (Ribbon Road Music)
4.
IT COULDN’T LAST When love is gone, when love has left you It’s gone for good, I’ll come and get you through it Don’t be strong, don’t think you should It couldn’t last, it’s gone for good The price was high, I tried to pay To make the hurting go away I was quick on my feet until today It couldn’t last, it’s gone away Chorus And all the promises, the days and nights I see it now, put out the light All I wanted, all that I dreamed Love didn’t answer or it wasn’t what it seemed When love is gone your heart stops beating You don’t belong, you lose the feeling for it An empty place without the faces It couldn’t last and now it’s gone Chorus And all the promises, the days and nights I see it now, put out the light And all the talk and all the smiles Left me to walk alone and I’ve run right out of miles When love is gone, don’t look back It’s gone for good. the good is passed Pack up your things and move along It couldn’t last and now it’s gone Chorus And all the promises, the days and nights I see it now, put out the light And all the summer-times have come around And fallen fast with the leaves onto the ground When love is gone, when love has left you It’s gone for good, I’ll come and get you through it Don’t be strong, don’t think you should It couldn’t last, it’s gone for good Words and Music - Brenda Heslop (Ribbon Road Music)
5.
LIVING WITH A STRANGER I was living with a stranger From the very first day Living there in danger In the very worst way I had my dreams then And I believed then All I could see was the best My crime is silence I didn’t shine the light I should’ve cried out I should’ve told the truth That very first day I was living amongst strangers From the very first day Jealousy commanded That hard religious way It drove their drinking Their twisted thinking It wore me to the bone My crime is silence I didn’t shine the light I should’ve cried out I should’ve told the truth That very first day I was living with a stranger From the very first day The sky too high above me The wind blew me away They bled my life blood The good ground where I stood They took my children and left the blame My crime is silence I didn’t shine the light I should’ve cried out I should’ve told the truth That very first day I was living with a stranger From the very first day Living there in danger In the very worst way He set me up high So he could take it all I didn’t know then How far he’d make me fall My crime is silence I didn’t shine the light I should’ve cried out I should’ve told the truth But I was living with a stranger From the very first day Words abd Music by Brenda Heslop (Ribbon Road Music)
6.
Suddenly 04:14
SUDDENLY I’m walking by the sea and look The sun is out today I’ve got some clothes that I don’t want Except to give away And suddenly a picture in the shop My body turns to water and I stop A horror film is running in me head And I remember wishing I was dead Chorus It breaks your heart, it breaks your heart It brings you down, yer stood apart And in the day it’s always night And in the sun there is no light It breaks your heart I’m wandering looking at a church I got here on me bike It’s peaceful and the leaves are blowing All the things I like And then I see a couple walking by Still very much in love, it’s in their eyes And I am down and crawling on my knees When I remember no-one’s loving me Chorus It breaks your heart, it breaks your heart It brings you down, yer stood apart And in the day it’s always night And in the sun there is no light It breaks your heart I start the day, I’m worried It’s the way it’s always been I cannot do right for the wrong And now I don’t believe I’m always thinking forward in me head Where everything has happened that I dread And when I get to where I’m going, someday I hope somebody smiles at me in someday Chorus It breaks your heart, it breaks your heart It brings you down, yer stood apart And in the day it’s always night And in the sun there is no light It breaks your heart, it breaks your heart I’m riding on a bus To where I study when I can This is not me country, not who I really am I see a man who’s talking on the phone He’s laughing, you can see he’s not alone And I don’t know how many years I’ve cried Living where I don’t belong and I’m not wanted Chorus It breaks your heart, it breaks your heart It brings you down, yer stood apart And in the day it’s always night And in the sun there is no light It breaks your heart It breaks your heart, it breaks your heart It brings you down, yer stood apart And in the day it’s always night And in the sun there is no light It breaks your heart, it breaks your heart It breaks your heart, it breaks your heart It breaks your heart, it breaks your heart It breaks your heart Words and Music by Brenda Heslop 2018 (Ribbon Road Music)
7.
DO UNTO OTHERS Do unto others as I have done Do unto others ‘cos I have won And I will always feel the pain And I am constantly under the rain And I am crying now for you Do unto others as I do There is much hate in the world The taking of a little girl And what can we do, held apart The stripping down of hands and hearts But if we are to be believed We feel the loss, we’re free to grieve Do unto others as I have done Do unto others ‘cos I have won And I will always hear the cry And catch the words as they fly by And I am crying now for you Do unto others as I do There are bruises in her eyes And fluttering birds caged in her mind And when each fist is made of stone And prison walls are called a home We can feel and understand We’ll be there to hold her hand Do unto others as I have done Do unto others ‘cos I have won And I will tell the truth again And I am hurt by women and men And I am crying now for you Do unto others as I do When she’s walking in the town Hearing voices to shout her down Still to be haunted in the street Not knowing what or who she’ll meet When the shaking starts to come She needs to know she’s not alone Do unto others as I have done Do unto others ‘cos I have won And I will always know the dark And I will blow upon the spark And I am crying now for you Do unto others as I do There is much hate in the world Words and Music by Brenda Heslop 2018 (Ribbon Road Music)
8.
WHEN THE BAD IS PASSED When the bad is passed When the cuts are bleeding When the bruises come and you lose the feeling When your mind goes numb And the words won’t come And you can’t get up cos you’re kneeling When the bad is passed And the hurricane’s gone It’s a question asked from a bitten tongue And the blue-black eye Is wondering why Do they say it’s time for healing Chorus And oh, you hope that somebody’ll come That sometime soon the paying will be done And oh, you hope that somebody’ll turn And rest will come When the bad is passed And the world’s gone mad It’s the wildest dream you ever had And you can’t get it straight ‘cos it’s just too late To find the deeper meaning When the bad is passed And it all goes still And the music’s stopped ‘cos of somebody’s will And the ache in your arms Been up your back It’s where you fell and it all fell flat Chorus And oh, you hope that somebody’ll come That sometime soon the paying will be done And oh, you hope that somebody’ll turn And rest will come When the bad is passed And the trust has left You see with your eyes and you know what’s best But you still can’t move And make the break You’ve lost your love and the love was fake When the bad is passed And you can’t think how It led to this, to do this now And the sadness covers you Like a cloak And the truth runs down your face and throat Chorus And oh, you hope that somebody’ll come That sometime soon the paying will be done And oh, you hope that somebody’ll come That sometime soon the paying will be done And oh, you wish that somebody’ll turn And rest will come Rest will come Words and Music by Brenda Heslop (Ribbon Road Music)
9.
NO-ONE CRYING OVER ME I can’t cry and I should cry Over what’s never been There should be tears for all the years Look what they’ve done to me And in the fading light I’m letting go tonight No-one’s crying over me Covered up, I’ve covered up To hide my shame And it’s broken me, I’m broken Choking inside these chains Fear is all there is, just like it always is No-one’s crying over me And as I let go Can’t help but see it Just like a picture painted on the wall And I am feeling God help me, leaving No-one crying, painted on the wall Beautiful, I was beautiful But it’s all gone by And who would know, who wants to know After all this time All that I could be, staring back to see No-one’s crying over me And as I let go Can’t help but see it Just like a picture painted on the wall And I am feeling God help me, leaving No-one crying, painted on the wall I’ve said it all, it all before No-one was listening Reached for the sky to hide the lie Nobody’s listening Now I don’t believe, why would I believe No-one’s crying over me No-one’s crying over me Words and Music by Brenda Heslop 2018 (Ribbon Road Music)

about

Five of these songs were written by Brenda especially for a project
we were involved in with Rachel Pain of Newcastle University,
looking into trauma associated with domestic violence.
Brenda and Rachel worked together with a women's group at My
Sisters Place in Middlesbrough, England over a two month period.
The women are survivors of domestic abuse and the songs were
inspired by them and their stories.
We also used four previously written songs during the sessions to
inspire deeper conversation.

A special thanks to all at My Sisters Place for kindly making room
for us and to the Paper Dolls group who have shared their lives so
generously, braved the odds and told the truth. Also to Ejaye who
watched over everyone with such care and understanding and to
Rachel for her trust and friendship.

credits

released September 28, 2018

Brenda Heslop - Vocals, guitar
Geoff heslop - Vocals, instruments
Jill Heslop - Vocals, accordion
Anna Heslop - Piano

Produced and arranged by Geoff Heslop
Recorded at Shipyard Studios, Northumberland
Sleeve Painting by Geoff Heslop

All Songs - words and music by Brenda Heslop (Ribbon Road Music)

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Ribbon Road UK

Ribbon Road are:

Brenda Heslop
Jill Heslop
Geoff Heslop

For the last 26 years, Brenda Heslop has been one of the undiscovered talents of songwriting. Only now is she starting to get the attention she has so long deserved, with singers taking up her lovely songs and spreading the word.
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